Wednesday, April 29, 2009

funerals and weddings

Last week, I learned a little something about myself. This is probably going to be another one of my 'personal' blogs, and less boring. No, I won't go into my lack of success with women. Instead, emotions at certain events.

For those who have been following my tweets and/or statuses on facebook, you probably know there was a recent passing at my workplace. Mary Weiler, who I've worked at Steak 'n Shake with the last 9 1/2 years, died last week. She was an older lady (64) who devoted much of her life to the restaurant industry. (she actually used to own a couple restaurants in E'ville, Catfish Heaven & Marys Fish and BBQ) I saw Mary every day up until early this month. She would always be coming in while I'd be getting ready to leave the place. We'd always catch up on our work gossip and random things. I still can't believe she's gone. I don't even think its sunk in yet. It's ironic to say that her last words were probably spoken at S'n S. During a busy lunch rush, she collapsed in the servers station after complaining earlier of dizziness. I wasn't there, but everyone said it was a freaky scene, and I can understand. As 911 was being called, she hesitated and was going to get back up. While she was laying down, one of her last words before her speech became slurred was '(Table) 22 needs a hot fudge sundae, while (table) 23 needs their drinks....'. It was later discovered she had a brain aneurysm. She never recovered after 6 hours of surgery, while going into a coma. The family decided to unplug her when her husband came into town.

Last week, we were talking about possibly going to the funeral home for her, and Chelsea, one of our managers, was saying how those places freak her out. I've been to several visitations, as well as funerals, so it's easy to say I'm no stranger to them. People even said that those places are easy to get emotional. I believe them. But despite of that, I admitted that I don't get emotional at death. It's not that it's a guy thing (so they say), but I was told years ago by someone that death 'is a part of life that we all go through'. After all, its the one thing we all have in common besides being born. Don't get me wrong, I do find death to be very sad, regardless of how they died. Maybe its the 'as long as it ain't me' thing or 'they finally get to rest now after years of living a good life', but for some reason I never cry or get emotional at funeral homes. I do look back on all the memories me and the deceased person had together, and I always try to come up with at least one thing that influenced me from them. We're all placed on this earth to help people in every way, after all.

I do admit, however, I have gotten emotional at a couple funerals. One was when my maternal grandfather died back in '02. Whenever I see my mom get emotional, I get emotional too. There's something about her that channels me.

I told Chelsea during our funeral conversation that I get really emotional at weddings more than funerals. She said that I must be more about the happy events. I suddenly realized she was right. I haven't been to that many weddings (since I'm always left off from the guest list lol), but when I see happiness among many people, I guess that's what triggers my eyes. Maybe its because I know that I'm witnessing a part of history in their lives, or maybe its because I'm envisioning my own wedding and I can't wait until I get my turn at marriage. The same goes for other positive things too, like when the St. Louis Cardinals won the 2006 World Series. I was in downtown St. L when it all happened, and it was the ultimate morale booster for the city probably ever since Mark McGwire hit home run 62 (another event where I got emotional). It may sound silly, but when I see someone work hard, pay their dues, and get something they deserved, then I can't help but feel happy for them.

What do you think?

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